A Series of Conversations #6: A Conversation That Includes An Invitation

Ever since The Protector had visited, Alan had been overly jovial with everyone as if he were overcompensating for the foul mood his father put him in. Conversations with him are still pleasant, but now shallow and even sometimes a little brittle. When he thinks no one is looking or paying attention to him, I see his face take on the expression of sadness and anger that he is trying to hide from the office. 

Our fathers are more alike than they or the world could fathom, but I have no idea how to bring that up, especially to a coworker. He is in the break room now, and he hasn’t noticed me yet, loitering around the door. I feel like I’m bursting to talk about it with him. But how do I even begin?

Do I just go into the break room and go, “Hey, I think we both are victims of our fathers?”

Or, “Hey, I think both of our dads are abusive, just in different ways?”

Or, “Hey, I know your dad probably never punched you in the face, but there are other ways to hurt someone.”

I go into the breakroom, and Alan looks up from his phone and smiles when he sees me. The smile looks genuine, but doesn’t reach his eyes.

“Hey, how’s your day going?” Alan asks.

“Fine,” I reply as I grab a cup of coffee. I don’t even want a cup of coffee; I just need to be doing something. “Busy.”

“Busy is good,” he added, before glancing back down at his phone.

I hold my cup of coffee before me like an offering or a shield. “Have a good one, Alan.”

“You too.”

I make a cowardly exit from the breakroom and try to find someone to give my unwanted cup of coffee to. 

After freeing myself of my coffee burden, I remembered Dragonboy was having a party this weekend. Maybe that would cheer Alan up? I decided to be brave, after having just been a coward, and walked quickly back to the breakroom. I saw Alan was still there and immediately began what turned out to be a nervous ramble:

“Would you like to go with me to Dragonboy’s party? It’s not really like a house party, more like a game night. We’re going to play board games and listen to some music. It will be mostly people from work, but I think Dragonboy has some friends at other rescue companies, so they might be there too, so good place to network, if that’s something you would want to do.”

Alan just stared at me for a moment as I finally exerted enough self-control to stop rambling and let him answer. 

“Yeah,” he answered with a slightly dazed look, “Yes, I would love to.”

“Great, I’ll get you Dragonboy’s address. It’s on Saturday, people will start showing up around 7.”

“That sounds great.”

“Ok,” I said, feeling both victorious and awkward, “Well,l I have to get back to work.”

“See you Saturday.” He called after me as I made another hasty exit.

A voice I didn’t recognize sounded from the breakroom as I left, “Yo, are you going on a date with The Traveler?!”

I face-palmed. I didn’t check for an audience before doing…that.